Weird Resolution - COMPLETED!

i made a rather weird new year resolution

TWO (2) years ago in November 2010 

that i will remain single 
for an entire year.

 admit it la, people.

its so common that new year resolutions
are never kept or completed..right?

but i'm proud to say,

 "HELL YEAH. i did it!" 

Alot of my friends thought i couldnt make it
through half a year..

but gimme some credit,
 i lasted more than a year! 

HA! TAKE THAT B*TCHES!

 It wasnt easy, i met a couple of guys and we hit it off, 

some were new and some were really old friends 

which we had some great fun together.
to tell the truth,
i was so tempted!
urghh...

Pretty happy that i was able to keep to this promise

 to myself until late January 2012. 

As though they knew that

 i have completed my one year of
 anti-relationship vow,

some of my closest friends started
 encouraging me to get back to dating.

"What the hell for~?!"

 i have just started getting used to 

being happy by myself and
 being super independant *konon la*, 

starting to have that awesome "i-dun-need-a-man" attitude,

all i ever focus on is work, family and my closest friends. 

So, just to let you know,

 i'm now dating once again.

.LOVE.

it started off awkward as hell.

being close friends since the first year of college,

dating your almost-best-friend is a huge risk.

i'm NOT a huge risk taker. 

but this was one risk i have no regrets making.

for now. 

we're not the perfect couple.

at least, we're trying.

 

so wish us luck, kays? 

That guy is ....YOU?

I've heard it all before.

Women complaining about their men.

"My man doesnt warn me before he farts!" 

"We dont get enough private time together!"

"I think I'm dating an immature little mama's boy."

"Men DO NOT know how to communicate their feelings la..."

"Why cant he be like Enrique Iglesias?!"

"The dude is all talk, no action!"

"The guy cant commit. Chicken shyt."

I can go on for hours. 

And reveal MORE of what goes on 

in a women's durrrrrty little discussion sessions 

about our male partners.

But like the men, women have their own 'Bro Code'

Its called ... Sisterhood!

 Or it could be called Girl Power, or Females Unite...

Or it might be the Bitch Club. 

Honestly I dont know. *facepalm*

epic fail. 

ANYWAY~! 

Just a short list of the most common complains i've heard about the males.

If you're a girl, maybe you can add on to the list by commenting.

If you're a guy, maybe you might identify yourself with one of the following,

and hopefully you can make some changes to make your girl happy. ;)

1. The Insanely Possessive

  PUH-lease la... stop smothering your girl. 

constantly texting or calling us to ask

"where are you? what u doing? who you with right now?" 

 is such a turn off. bloody annoying.. 

u should learn to trust her, and if you dont, 

remind me, why are you still dating her?

2. Temper Temper

maybe i hang out with girls that just will not accept 

having to live their life trying to walk on eggshells 

or navigate through a bloody bombmine.

He loses his temper real quick and yells the entire house down, or

decideds to try angering you as well to have a screaming match.

keep your temper in check or 

go invest in a real punching bag to vent

your stress on!

3. Too Self-Obsessed and Very Vain

i personally had a boyfriend like this,

 and omg... the pain of waiting for him to dress up!

He would take nearly a hour to make sure he's hair is done right,

matching belt buckles, shoes gotta match shirt, ...etc

worst part of dating this kind of guy is, 

all he talks about is about how great he is,

what a stud he was in back then,

the gurls he's got then and now...

Oi~! i'm not gonna date another woman!

 One woman in this relationship is enough!

4. Mr Please-Grow-Up

At some point it’s time to grow up la, guys...

 Ditch the rude statement T-shirts, rockstar hair and gaming addiction!

 Seriously, we just want you to dress and act maturely. 

Too much to ask?

Spend QUALITY time with us.

You dont have to take us out on expensive dates, exotic getaways or

take your entire saving account to buy us that diamond ring!

(although we wouldn't mind that, of course)

Take us for a drive and make it a mission 

to find out what we think about a certain topic, how was our day, 

whats our favourite lingerie brand, make future plans together

or make us laugh like you used to when you were still wooing us.

Well, there is always time and a place to be childlike and have good fun,

but we girls naturally love a mature man with some sense of direction in life. 

p/s : GAMING IS NOT A CAREER! 

5. "LOOK At Those Boobies and that Arse!"

 You may think you are being sneaky, or think girls are blind

 but we caught you glancing at the hot chick as she passed by. 

 Dont you dare deny it!

We know that men are visual creatures,

but it is really hurtful if we are out with you 

and you can’t stop staring at that lady's amazing D-cup boobies,

or that Almost-JLo-Arse chick at the mall.

In my opinion, the worst of all is,

we catch you staring at your ex-girlfriend.

 The level of hurt for this one is...

like you got your heart stepped on by an elephant. 

An obese elephant.

This just TRULY bothers us and it can even ruin the entire evening. 

Want us to check out other men's six packs or their package?

Did i hear a 'no'?

Refer back to Number 4 and learn to act more maturely. 

6. Men are just "all talk"

Probably the biggest complaint from the females about men. 

Most common example

Man : "I'll call you in a while."

Woman: "Okay." 

 *waits for an entire day*

Don't woo us and tell us that you're truly ready for commitment, 

then decide to freak out at the last minute. 

 An even better example is 

telling a woman you are ready for a relationship, 

but your actions completely prove otherwise.

 Why bother getting yourself in this relationship if

all you want to do after work is sit in front of the tv/computer?

And it takes you half an hour to reply us on your handphone 

when we replied you almost immediately after you texted us first! 

 

You are not Barney Stintson. 

While its cool if you are almost-like him,

showering us with compliments, sweet words and gifts are acceptable 

but please don't waste our time and energy by declaring your undying love.

We might do something crazy, like... believe you.

Be genuine with yourself and with us,

we would appreciate it so much and respect you a lot more. 

7. Mommee's Lil Boy 

I don't know how to start. Wait. 

Are you going to run to mommy right after you read this?

I'm dating Y-O-U. 

Not your mom, just you.

So please understand when we just feel turned off when

you invite your mom to join in on our movie date. 

You wont like watching a movie with our dad seated beside you. 

 8. Stone Cold

We know you would like us to think 

you are such a gentleman,

always wanting to make us happy 

and letting us make 'important' decision for the both of us.

"Anywhere is fine. I eat anything. I'm fine with everything. 

The more the merrier, you call them la. You make the plans, I'll be there" 

 

It just makes us think guys are no fun, uptight, dull, 

takes no initiative to plan any dates, or 

who never have any ideas about where to go for dinner, vacations or activities.

If you are like this, 

 it’s time to wake up and find your passion. 

Put a little energy into the relationship. 

We think this is boring and yes, it stresses us out too!

5 Types of Guys to only DATE, not MARRY!

I have a very bad habit.

one that i wished i never had.

no, its not farting or cam-whoring la, people.

it's just that
after i dated a string of guy, dumped them, and
...i later start labelling them. 

I'M SORRY!!! 

T,T

i remember my first boyfriend and.....

oh wait, doesn't everyone? 

...i'd probably label him -
Mr Sensitive Soul. 

you know, he's like the family man, the mr.nice guy, 

and loves to say "hunnybunny/snookums".

advantages : he knows how to cook and organize family picnics

disadvantage : your mom loves him (toomuch), dad thinks the guy is far too feminine and I'm wiping his tears after offering him MY shoulder to cry on during a chick flick movie 

then after that was
Mr Grumpy.

the guy that cant stop complaining and starts losing his temper by the minute.

advantages : it's predictable, everyday. No surprises when he explodes.

disadvantages : he ruins your day by being a pain in the royal arse. Embarrasses you in public with his screaming or complaints. 

 i met two (2) Mr I-Swear-I'm-Famous!
these guys are like bags of wind, like a desperate struggling artist, 

he tries convincing everyone he's good at this and that! 

advantages : entertains with good stories

disadvantages : you know its all lies, right? :)
confront him and he'll turn into Mr Grumpy

but luck was never on my side, and after two dates,

i gave up on the Hulk.

i don't need to explain it la right? have you watched the movie? 

no, the guy i went out with isn't green and his underwear is not thaaat stretchable.

advantages : to carry shopping bags, my bodyguard after i've caused trouble

disadvantages : might break me in half, sweats like a pig. 

for now, i've proven to myself that buff/hot guys

aren't as gentleman, charming and funny
like Jared Padalecki and Taylor Lautner .

Go ahead and date a common looking guy and be surprised.
*drum rolls please*
 introducing to you - Mr Love Pirate.
just think of Captain Jack Sparrow.
he might not be sweet or cuddly, but golly,
have you asked him how many girls he has already dated?!
and dont forget to ask : "how many more u dating right now?"
Just go check his phone. PRONTO!

advantages : girls get to exercise their slapping skills

disadvantage : i don't like sharing. so goodbye playboy! 

 so there you go, peeps. the six kinda guys i've dated thus far.

it's not hard to wonder why

i'm bloody happy being single right now, eh?

i'm not sexist btw. no, really. i'm not. 

am pretty damn sure you girls have dated these men too. ;p

and the guys, well... 

you probably know what label u are gonna get!

over and done with-!

I've had enough of feeling like the bad person!

So what if i was the one who ended the relationship?

Does that really make me the villain now?!

Answer these questions below

1. Would you still be with someone you no longer trust?
2. Shouldn't we be honest about our feelings in a relationship?
3. Must a GF report on her whereabouts, who she's yumcha-ing with, what she doing daily?
4. Can you seriously tahan sumone calling u daily three/four times, multiples texts, countless facebook inbox messages, doodles love n kisses on ur Facebook wall all in one day? 

i can keep going with all these questions but like i've said before, i've had enough. :)  i'll just keep it as short and simple as i possibly can, then i'm going to never speak of this ever again. So here goes, take a deeeep breath peeps!

• i broke up with him via a phonecall on a beautiful balcony of a Marina Court penthouse (*much thanks to Chung). i no longer had the same feelings that i had before. Before anyone thinks that i was just playing around, i'm just going to say it riiiiiight here : " Hell no." 

• Mostly because of my own beliefs, i wanna be with someone who shares the same principles as i do. I believe dating is a very serious matter and sex is only after marriage. It broke my heart when i found out he didn't share the same views on the matter. 

• i tried overlooking it, to forget it and focus on his other qualities. It worked for a while until i found out he had been lying to me on a certain matter for nearly two weeks. I'd try pointing it out many times, but if he still thinks i'm falling for it then forget it. My respect flew out of the window in a nanosecond. 

• And trying to control is not going to work, hun! You don't have to be my best friend to figure  out that i hate being controlled! I can't stand having to pick up the phone to tell my whereabouts, then continue to answer the same old questions "where are u? what you doing there? who is there? when you going home?" 

• i think i'm the only girl in the world that kinda hates the cute name calling like " baby, bb, b" or the overusage of "i love u". EVERY SMS,CALL,MESSAGE is filled with this! There should be a limit! I dun feel like its special anymore... 

Okay. i've had enough and i'm stopping right here.

the END.

i can bet you guys feel like you're studying for a pop quiz 

if you've read this whole post. LOL~ 

 pat urself on the back, peeps!

I truly applaud and appreciate you! <3

tell me if what you think, or if you've been thru the same as i did.

please makes me smile once more...

we talked it over and...
altho it was a lil of bashful confessions and lotsa laughs. 

but underneath it all, i know that i've had enuff of this relationship.

there is just no way of turning this around anymore. i've tried.

like a contaminated bottle of juice... there is just no way of changing it back to fresh juice!

haha! sounds funny but yeah, thats how i pictured it in my mind.
not unless ur the juice and i have the enzymes to de-bacteria the juice. 

its not easy :(

i'll just have to gather whatever courage is left in my previously cold heart.

*yanks hair out*

i.cannot.not.lose.my.temper.today.

i'm seriously trying to be so effing patient and understanding.

there is just no way
that i would explode in my boyfren's face.
or rather, into my darling handphone to my bf's ears.

there is also no way
am i going to go and tattle tale to my dad
even tho he's deemed my bestest best fwen in the world.
who has heard me complain/muse abt nearly everything i cud think of.

for the first time in my life,

i'm actually annoyed at picking up the phone.

like, i was reluctant to see who the caller was.

i'm evil. i know.
i swear i was not always like this.
unless i was back in KL, where being bitchy is cool when you're a tiny teen. some might agree that KL-ites are often quite bitchy. O,O

i feel like an OLD lady

looks like me right?! 

maybe it's becuz i've not been dating for 3 years,
so i've forgotten how complicated it is to be in one.

i dont mind the complications. its bound to happen from time to time. but once i've confronted it and it happens AGAIN! AND AGAIN! Lord have mercy on my impatient soul, i get irritated. And irritation usually makes me...or anyone easily angry.
i dun like it tho it happens often :(

i think i might have a baaaaaad case of being a people pleaser.
i tend to want, no wait, make that - I HAVE to please people i care about. 

its a bad habit. i know. am trying to get over it.
lets see the list of people i normally go all out to please. hmmmm.... 

1. daddy
2. mommy
3. sisters
4. besties
5. boyfriend
6. closefrens

doesnt look like much but seriously, its effing hard to please any one. it gets harder if there is more than one person to please at the same time. usually its my parents AND my boyfriend.

he's being really... i cant say demanding like how he described himself.
but i'm just not used to having someone keep tabs on me all the time. Its just weird. even my own parents dun keep daily tabs on where i am, what i'm doin, or who i'm with!

i will mengistiharkan right here : " i, charlottefong, cannot stand reporting on my whereabouts, and who i am with at a constant basis. "

hate crying

might sound childish but yes, i do hate crying.

i can do whatever emotions i want, but crying!
i'd stop myself silly, or i was just try.

The Sad-kinda Cry

• Even at grandma's passing, i only allowed myself to cry at the hospital. After that, i'd only teared up at the funeral, if it overflows i'll quickly wipe it away. 

• When my boyfren walked past the departure gates into the airport to go to UK.

• Getting separated from the main group in NS while doing the navigation thru the jungle test... i was one of the two that tried our best not to cry like the other four bawling babies.

 The Frustrated/Angry/Disappointed-kinda Cry

• The last time i ever cried like this was.... lemme think.... when my first boyfriend and i were arguing back in 2006. And that made us break-up. That was when i promised to myself : i'd never involve myself in anything related to anger if i were to EVER enter a relationship. but... Eff that! Screw that promise over ten times fold and still, there'd be excess. 

• so yeah, i do blame myself for bringing this to myself. i dun wanna lose my temper so i held it in. And when i do that, i start tearing up. I told him i'd be back home at one, but i came back at three. understandable, but we kinda had this talk bfore and i foresaw it. i'm not trying to be a smartass by saying i foresaw it. but rather, i already said to him bfore he left that "i dun answer to anyone but myself and God. but i'm trying to change, i'm already telling u where i am most of the time and usually i nvr tell how i feel about another, but now i do"

you might think the solution is simple, "don't hold it in then!" Sorry, no.. to lose my temper is un-christian-like and, I'm just going to be more patient with myself and him.

far too many questions...

what if ...

• i never feel 'it's all right' for him to mingle with his exes or past flings?
• there was a part of me that still worry of what other's think of this relationship?
• i had waited for him to come back from UK, then only had a relationship with him? 
• what he said was right about me being swept off my feet by another?

.....

...

..

.

what if this perfect relationship begin to show signs of imperfections?

just shoot me now. 

quiet down, dear mind.

im back in that black hole of loneliness and emotional wreck. of course its not even half as bad as it was 4 years ago... 

this is just a separation, not a break-up.

i wished i had met him a year ago. or two years ago. then we could have made plans together. but the pessismistic side of me thinks it wud hv been better if i never met him. i'd still be the new me - independent, strong and carefree.

like a hermit or an anti-social, i just stayed at home ever since he left. this is probably the longest period of time i have spent at home in...more than a year. hahaha! 

i did cry when he left. and in his house before i gave him and his family a lift to the airport. and another time after he went thru the departure gates. and once more in the airport carpark. another one at the Yacht Club. and the final one of that day, on my bed.

crazy shyt if u ask me. no one has seen me cry. unless u mean, tearing up at the movies. 

skin tones differ?

 dated an english-educated chinese for too long. 

kinda regretting it. so yeah, if YOU are reading this (the english educated chinese tht dated me back then), i'll let you know that you were being unfair and mean! its called playful flirting and i've NVR cheated. you did. i just refused to be a gossip monger and tell the  whole church on u. which u obviously enjoyed doing. or maybe it was ur sis. i dunno. i dun care.

   dated a dreamy Johorian malay for a lil while.

he was sooooooo easy going. its the type of relationship reserved only in boring english movies. where couples would sit down, hv tea, chit chat then hv a walk. he's not much of a talker or a looker but gawd, i thank God everyday he's my dance partner in Akedemi Sri Ledang (the Glee of Kem NS Sri Ledang, Johor! we were AWESHUM!!!) sucha gentle soft spoken guy whose family were so divine in accepting me as anak-angkat :')  imissyoulabuddy!

but i don't think it wud be wise to suddenly hv a crush on a guy at least three tones darker than myself. 

im no racist. i hv best friends who aren't chinese. heck! i grew up in KL lah~ high skewl was filled wif them indians and malays. i had an indian bestie for a while... cuz she moved away to shah alam. :( then i lost her number back in form 2. sigh. i still hv my malay close frens too! hehe! but anyway, the point is... i dun think its as simple as a crush. stupid of me, yes. crazy of me, hell yeah. 

flings = not charlotte. 

i swear, if i had to. i wudnt go on with this crush. met him thru... i think i shud blardy dedicate this blog to Alvin. he seems to get me into trouble all the time. i met this guy thru Alvin. seen him hang out wif Alvin alot around JP smoking shisha. dunno why he hangs around indians. IM NOT RACIST. ;p just worried he might be hanging out wif the wrong crowd. but im not his momma. i hv this soft spot for anyone from my KK primary skewl days. he's a in rough patch for a while. i dun care wad others say of him, as long he's honest and looks out for me, im doin the same. so shoot me, if he doesn't.